My Dad was washed, shaved and dressed ready for my visit – it was the loveliest thing anyone could have done for us.
David lived in Amersham and was a Cabin Service Director for British Airways, he flew for 34 years, travelling around the world. He loved his job and wanted to spend as much time travelling as possible after he retired at 60. David and his wife Gillian spent eight years exploring and seeing the sights before David was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease.
As David’s illness got worse, his Neurologist suggested going for respite stays at the Hospice giving him time to recuperate and also giving Gillian, who was his main carer, some respite. This also meant that David didn’t have to go into a care home. Louise took her sons to see David at the Hospice each day after school. They brought him dinner and he enjoyed his young grandsons reading to him in the Hospice garden. David’s son, Paul also visited him during his respite stays.
Shortly after David had returned home from his final respite stay, he became very unwell and had stopped eating. Gillian immediately called the Hospice and was told to bring him straight there. At the time Louise, who was also Cabin Crew for British Airways (following in her dad’s footsteps), had just landed in Chicago. Louise needed to return home, as David was dying.
Louise reflected “I immediately flew home and when I arrived at the Hospice the next day, Dad was sat up in bed, looking quite well. I was taken aback because I thought I wasn’t going to make it in time. The Hospice team had washed, shaved, and dressed Dad ready for my arrival, this was such an amazing thing to do for us both.”
“We visited Dad over the next couple of days; my sons came to see him, he was quite sleepy, but he opened his eyes, looked at them and shook both their hands for a final time. After this he didn’t open his eyes again.”
“There was a volunteer who made teas and coffees, she had got to know Dad well from his respite stays, I invited her to come and see Dad and she sat and held his hand and spoke to him. This lovely lady had such a connection with the patients, it was so wonderful, and a level of care we hadn’t expected.”
“In the final couple of days, I remember how peaceful he seemed, the most peaceful I’d known him since his Parkinson’s began. There was a calm in the room while Mum, Paul and I talked about his life and reflected on the good times and his travels. He passed away peacefully with Mum by his bedside at the age of 78.”
Louise said “Dad’s death was everything he deserved and more. The Hospice staff were exceptional, they were so mindful of us all as a family and controlled his pain expertly. I remember thinking how peaceful and dignified his death was and this is all down to the care he received at the Hospice, I know this is so different to what he could have received in hospital.
“At the time it all felt a bit surreal, but it’s later when you reflect that you fully appreciate the care that Dad received. I remember asking the nurses how they do it, it’s such a hard job. They told me that it is an ‘utter privilege’ to care for people at the end of their life. I find this astonishing, the staff at the Hospice work so hard and should be recognised every day for the work they do.”